Time to match the philosopher to the pro wrestling catchphrase! Here are some initial ones:
1. Ric Flair and Socrates, ‘To be the man, you gotta beat the man, woooooooooooo!’.
A figure of mythical significance, Socrates was very much the man to beat in Athens when it came to philosophical argument. He went around the market square picking fights (arguments) with the high and mighty. Few could go toe to toe with him, and many were exposed as charlatans. He irritated so many people that he was eventually executed.
(This catchphrase is currently the subject of much controversy, with Ric Flair apparently trying to trademark the moniker ‘The Man’, currently Becky Lynch’s gimmick, on the basis of it. To me, this seems like a stretch…)
2. Bret Hart and St Anselm, ‘I am the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be’.
St Anselm famously argued that God necessarily exists in part by defining God as that-than-which-no-greater-being-can-be-thought. By the same token, if Bret Hart is the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be, does that mean Bret Hart necessarily exists? Let’s hope so.
3. Chris Jericho and Heraclitus, ‘Things will never, eeeeeeeeeever be the same again’.
Things will never eeeeeeeeever be the same again? This would be music to the ears of Heraclitus, who thought that things are always changing, and in constant flux. Nothing stays as it is, even if it seems to. Can you step into the same river twice, junior?
4. Charlotte Flair and Elisabeth of Bohemia, ‘I am the Queen of all Eras’.
Royalty is a constant theme in pro wrestling, and Charlotte Flair has as good a claim as any to be the Queen. Elisabeth of Bohemia, though, was royalty (albeit a Princess, not a Queen), who wondered how an immaterial mind could interact with a material body.
5. Tetsuya Naito and Epicurus, ‘Tranquilo’.
Naito is the coolest guy around. Nothing fazes him, and he keeps ‘tranquilo’, no matter what. Epicurus would nod approvingly, as he thought the best life is the calm life, where you don’t let yourself get swayed by intense pleasures or pains.